Actually when I called Angelo's boss to have her yell at him about not knowing where my hotel was she got on the phone with him and I could hear him calling me a "drag queen" over and over. I assume he meant drama queen. Thing is, it became rather apparent over the evening that Angelo was a little light in the loafers himself. BAH!

Re: flesh colored body stocking....it's not me it's photoshop. I'll cry Kristin Davis. Oh wait.

Saved by the Swiss. So compulsively prompt, organized, efficient, obsessively on, and sooo middleclass, - its the German/French thing- they need to have as much 'time of thier life' as possible. Be glad you didn't have to gig in Ticino someplace, like Locarno, then it would be the Italian mess again. Its a chuckle sometimes how Europeans seem to live up to their stereotypes.

As for the car ride, I think someone in the industry needs to market a kind of life preserver/body armor for DJs specifically for these drunken-host-airportshuttles. No one here likes to think of Pickles getting turned into relish.

Pickles, your blog is so much more engaging than, let's say, another fake press release from Michael Lucas. Oh, the wham-bam-thank-you-glam path you're on, sister. For reals.

Oh please...
we've all made out that with that guy.

I'm in San Francisco with the wife.
Doing a show with Joey Arias tomorrow so will probably have similar pics.

And speaking of wives...
your ex is on her way to Barcelona to visit you. Get ready for trouble.

My wife is yelling at me to come (and we all know not to make the Empress wait) And there is no smoking in the hotel so I REALLY better get off the lap top quick.
I'll read your blog later.
(I just looked at the pics)

Note to empress/ You were in my dream last night at a club in SF and you tripped and fell and broke your ankle. Please be careful. It's just a dream hon but you never know.

oh my gay gash!
sister you are really living it up!!!!
i wish i could come along for some of the ride.

you mentioned "snakes."
do the boarders know that code?

loving you so much.
missing you more!!!!

Oh right, FYI "snakes" is our answer to the ever-growing and complicated culture of "bears". Snakes are thin and wiry and almost hairless. We have snake volleyball, snake retreats, snakenight at bars.

Welcome home Texxx! Glad you're back. How was your fierce sail trip??? Wanna hear about it. Pull any boat trade?

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Um , rewind.....who is that man you 'made out' with? D E T A I L S!

How is it I'm missing this trip? Im in need of being the DJ's bitch!!!

Im loving all these posts! I can only imagine what is not being written about.


X

sail trip was VERY white woman,
VERY riche, VERY straight...
it's a trip to be taken with a limitless budget.
don't ask how i got there.

not another faggot ANYWHERE.
so...
didn't pull trade, but got some shade.
last night out we all dressed as pirates - i looked FIERCE!! - and i saw some a-hole's doing the limp wrist motion and talking about me.
my sister had to get me out of there before i pushed one of them over the railing into the water.
was fantasizing of a pirate brawl (a la saloon night in portland - remember dadz and momz??!?)
but alas, 'twas not to be.

will also just say that living on a boat
with ten people for ten daze is challenging
no matter how lovely they are. yet no love was lost in this group. we're all still friends!

if i did it again it would be in the mediterranean where we could hit the french riviera, italy, and/or greek islands.
at least there i would see some fellow fagz.

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That's good you all made it out still friends and it didn't became the remake of 10 Little Indians.

Here with Justin and Nathan getting ready to do a tranny bar crawl tonight with the horses. Yesterday we wnt to the Picasso museum and Sagrada Familia (sand drip church). Today we took the train to Figueres to Dali's museum/teatro. I have to say I was a tad underwhelmed. SOme of the art was fierce but it wasn't hung well (stop snickering!). Lighting was bad and there was no rhyme or reason. Perhaps they intended it to be that way but that combined with all the groups of high school tours sort of did my head in. The decorated rooms were better than the paintings I thought. There's also a slight smell of manure everywhere and, since I'm not travelling with Jackie Bigalow, that seemed odd. It's been great having home faces around and I think I've convinced them how wonderful Barcelona is.

I hate to say it Boo, but you really should have gone into debt (further...BAH!) and bought a ticket. It's not touching the void sweetie, but it's just as fun. And way more crowned heads you don't have to see through ski pants.

Yeah I made out with that guy. And he was dressed like a GUY if you can believe it.

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So the ex-wife and her new wife are sleeping in so I thought I'd do a little update while I have my afternoon cuppa. I left off previously about to embark on a tranny bar crawl with my friend Reuben. So we go to meet Reuben who is at his friend's apt for a birthday party. He says, "They are a bit like the get-along-gang so just come scoop me up and we'll go." Love her. Don't know what the get-along-gang is but somehow I understand. One drink at the party and we pile into a taxi to our first stop, a bar called La Bata. I have been dying to go to this place because I came here 3 years ago with Texxx on one of my first trips to BCN. It's a shitty hole in the wall bar with great music, hustlers, faeries, punks, and cool chicks. Often at the door someone will peek through before they let you in to make sure it is not the accost of the Lacoste. Nathan and I are featuring suspenders and Justin is giving fierce face. People are kinda gagging, very "Who just walked in?" The place is packed and it's so narrow you are either standing at the bar or you are against the wall. We shuffle along the wall to the back where fortunately a big group has just vacated the back salon. Ok so salon is way too fancy a word to describe it, it's just a room witha fluourescent light and some wood chairs and a table with a hubcap ashtray. Get the picture? This place is the BCN version of say the Cock or Phoenix. As we sit down to drink and smoke (INSIDE!) a mulleted young faerie from Portugal sits with us and looking at Justin his jaw drops. He says almost joking, "I loved you in your movie Shortbus." All of us are a bit surprised and Justin thanks him at which point the kid flips out screaming "I was not serious, is it really you? What the fuck are you doing here? Oh my god you're fabulous what are you doing here?".

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I forgot to post my pics from our Dali house excursion. Here you go, the front...

And...

Justin...

Mae West sculpture...

So we adopt this portuguese faerie for the rest of the night as he takes us around the Raval (district of BCN that's like the L.E.S.) trying to get into squatter's after hours. But no one seems to be answering the door at either place we try. Oh well, no worries cause we end up hanging out in an alley outside some club just drinking beers and smoking hash with the sharp smell of piss in the air. Justin has fallen in love with Barcelona by this time. Next day....do nothing but sleep and eat. Tonight we're going back out on the tranny crawl. Who knows....

You are KILLING us with your blog!
It's the talk of the town.
I don't even know where to begin.
Yes I do...
That bitch Justin is wearing MY scarf that Todd Thomas made exclusively for ME!!!!!


Please tell her to take it off.

In fact, it has already been published on a very influential fashion blog.

Diane Pernet Party

So tell her to take it off.

OK, she had the hair first...
I'll give her that.

Oh please daddy, "talk of the town"? That means you and hattie just make fun of me at tea time at Rapture. And I am there in spirit!

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