Earl

If you happen to come on and read this..I am a bit confused by today's emails..

IS Unisex continuing past tonight's edition?

And best of luck to you with all future projects..

Chi Chi and Motherboard Members,

Just reading this now. The mass email I sent out was meant to be diplomatic in the face of an otherwise horrible situation.

Unisex is continuing, though without my involvement and without my blessing. I spent nearly four months toiling to help build that party, and I feel completely abused (literally), maligned and disrespected.

I'm not going to to go into the particulars here, since I am still trying to be diplomatic and take the "high road," but suffice it to say I am not at all happy with the way things were handled.

On the bright side, I am fortunate to be working on a bunch of rewarding projects including 3 large-scale versions of Weimar New York this summer at the Spiegeltent and producing a couple of shows for the David Bowie-curated High Line Festival . And I'm again working with Dixon Place for this year's HOT! Celebration of Queer Culture.

Thank you to everyone who supported Unisex Salon. If you continue to patronize the party and/or lend your talents to the evening, that's completely fine. Just know that I am not involved, and while the decision to leave was mine, it was more accurately a capitulation to the unpleasant reality of the situation.

~Earl

Nine cheers for Earl! Who as far as I can tell was responsible for the coolest parts of Unisex and is an unadulterated joy to work with. I only wish you had taken the name with you. But you don't need to hear that. And -- oh. Oh yes. Happy Birthday Earl!!

Taking it to circle:

I was sickened when I heard of the events that precipitated Earl’s departure from Unisex. When a club promoter – a gay club promoter - kicks someone when they're down, calls them a 'pussy faggot' in front of a room full of people, continues kicking him until people pull him off and then threatens to ‘finish the job’ via email - I’m sorry, but someone - other than Earl - has to speak up. And really, it should be the people who were there.

If you know about this and continue to support what’s left of Unisex and continue to work with its remaining promoter as if nothing happened - you are speaking up: You’re saying violent acts are ok as long they’re not happening to you. Youre saying a club promoter can behave in the shittiest way possible and it doesnt matter, because you're gonna show up next week and kiss his ass anyway.

When I heard about this, I couldn’t cancel our show there fast enough. And while Earl has given so much to so many of us and certainly more than deserves our loyalty, this isn’t really about Earl. This is about injustice happening right before our eyes. This is about how we, the larger circle, react to such outrageous, horrifying behavior – and what we, as individuals, are choosing to do about it.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Jade,

goose...goose...goose...goose...goose...goose... DUCK!!!

I didn't realize that this incident apparently occurred in the club when it was full of patrons... the story I heard (and not from Earl) made me think it was in a totally different location-- like on the street, on the way home in the early A.M.
Very irresponsible.

If it didn't happen exactly the way I heard it, my apologies to all. But it did happen. I certainly would not bother writing about this and committing it to online 'eternity' if I didn't have it on good authority - from Earl and others involved.

For example, a close friend and fellow performer who was there the night of Mar 8 witnessed much of the event. According to him - what I described above (except, obviously the email exchange) took place. He then left the next day for two weeks - expressing shock to me as recently as yesterday that many of the same people who were there and saw it happen are reportedly still there - as if nothing happened! As if Earl was not savagely beaten and driven to abandon his own event. Last night, Earl casually remarked (but not without a note of surprise in his voice) that S & Q were the only performers who "showed any loyalty".

I know it takes two to Tango. And being 'loyal' to someone in a nightclub tiff when I'm not involved is not something I usually stick my neck out for.

But, did I miss something here? Is there something about this event that makes it so unimportant? To me, its important to take a stand against violence of any kind - especially by our own kind. I get angry when I think about him getting away with it - by people continuing to support him as if nothing important had happened - as if no one had been physically abused - as if his behavior was somehow 'ok'. Seems wrong and worth standing up for.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Jade,

I only heard a very annotated version, right after it happened, so my original perception is probably incorrect.

Yeah, I didnt see it with my own two eyes either. So one hopes one is operating with the right information. I guess it all struck me as not very surprising, and at the same time really disappointing - and maybe that's why I'm so mad.

I'm just reading these comments now. I am going to take some time to figure out an appropriate response. For the moment I'll just say that the veracity of Jade's second hand account is largely accurate. The situation is unnecessarily complicated and incredibly unfortunate.

I do appreciate Jade's support because I think that in attempting to be diplomatic there is an impression that everything is fine. I'm fortunate that I often have the resilience, the creativity and the chutzpah to make lemonade when I'm given a load of lemons. That doesn't mean I would have rather not been given the sour lot to begin with!

I'll post more when I collect my thoughts and determine exactly how much I feel comfortable discussing online.

~Earl

My two cents:

I am the fellow performer Jade mentions as witnessing the despicable behavior at the 3/8/07 Unisex party. Of course, there were many more besides me.

I have been going to Unisex since it first opened and was a vocal supporter of such an ambitious and positive contribution to New York nightlife and community.

Despite having a 6 am flight the next day to St. Croix, I went to Unisex that night because it was a magical occurrence and because Earl suggested we discuss the where and how of exhibiting my photographs there.

I was only a few feet from Earl when he was attacked and then repeatedly kicked while on the floor. I was shocked and disgusted by the behavior I witnessed on account of its violence, its unprofessionalism, and its very public nature. I left dazed and disgusted several minutes later and made my way to the airport.

I returned to New York two weeks later to find that there had been little or no public outcry and that most people continued to support the party even after Earl's subsequent departure, therefore supporting as well the behavior of its remaining promoter.

Like Jade, I could not dissasociate myself fast enough from Unisex. Supporting a friend and fellow artist, supporting the idea of a mutually sustainable and positive community, these are much more important to me than having my work shown in a poisoned atmosphere.

As another good friend and positive force in our community recently remarked to me in light of other unappetizing goings-on, "if righteous indignation were a disease, I would have been dead a long time ago." Ditto.

Let's do our best to respect each other, support good people doing good things, and let those endeavors that are neither positive nor community-building wither on the vine.

Well it may just be my opinion but I think if someone was being physically assaulted cops should have been called.

Aside from that where was club security?

Aside from that, without knowing at all what took place there several weeks ago it was apparent to me the content of the party's last few editions was markedly off its pre-Earl departure programs.

This is the kind of thing that is so self-destructive especially since nightlife here has been continually atrophied for quite a while now. It doesn't need to be destroyed from within.

A main dimension of human stupidity is violence.

if you mention the motherboards this thursday, you will be admitted for two cents.






ps- throwing the drink in my face is why i kicked earl out. earl is no longer with the party because the club no longer wants him there. he has proved to be a liability to the club and himself.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: James Coppola,

What a cheap and juvenile gesture. The wet behind the ears, messy and egotistical "new blood" are obviously feeling it. The motherboards IS the community fool. There are all kinds of people young and old that read these forums.

Besides that I suggest we get the whole story first, and then an online campaign can easily be started, via myspace and the boards if necessary.

My 2 cents? don't feel too fab yet junior... you're just an amateur, an uninteresting and tired one at that. "Taffy... for 14 you don't look so good"

quote:

thats exactly my point. none of you know the whole story. all of this nonsense condemning me as some kind of homophobe monster and not one of you knows very much at all. none of you know that i had surgery that day, and thus had an open wound and bandage on my stomach. none of you know that earl knew that and still didnt show up until 4 hours after the party started to host this party that he had so much to do with. none of you know that even though earl knew that i had a two inch open wound on my stomach, he threw an entire drink in my face, which consequently soaked the bandage and could have infected the wound further. none of you know that after i kicked him while he was in the fetal position (the place he put himself right after starting the fight) he ambled back over to the bar where he picked up a champagne bucket of gasoline, more accurately, white petrol and tried to throw it on me. none of you know that earl was not allowed to handle money, drink tickets or stage management because of his drinking. and theres so much more that none of you know. so while earl stays "diplomatic" and on the "high road" you guys can all feel real righteous in your support.

ps- joshua dear, earl couldnt take the name with him because i named the party.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: James Coppola, 04-10-07 03:22 AM

There is no excuse James. I don't care how drunk he was, what he did or didn't do. How you handled it was unacceptable. I'm not here to support Earl - I'm sure he had his part to play. I'm here to point out that you dealt with the situation in just about the worst way possible - and it hurts all of us.

Everybody fucks up, James. But when you do - you admit you're sorry and you do things a person who's genuinely sorry does - like take responsibility for what you did. Unfortunately, because you were the aggressor, this burden falls primarily on you.

Obviously you were really mad at Earl and it escalated into violence. But, like it or not, you're in a position of leadership. And if this is about community, connection, creative expression and the like (as opposed to - lets see - violence, war, disconnection, power-tripping, darkness) - then it's our role to police ourselves and point out when someone majorly fucks up. We call this looking out for our own. We've all been there in one way or another, the difference is you chose to act it out publicy - and in a truly hateful way. I personally feel we're completely within our bounds to call you on your shit - right here.

Its sad that your party is no longer even worth two cents, because to give it value at this point is to enable you to believe what you did was justifiable - which it wasn't. I don't think you're a monster, James. I've seen you around over the years, involved in things, at Short Mountain with the faeries. But your actions speak of somebody who's way off track. And you need to take responsibility for what you did before its 'business as usual'.

jade- you saying that you "dont care... what he did or didnt do.." is so silly. i didnt choose to "act this out publicly", he did. i was not the aggressor, he was. throwing a drink in someones face is VIOLENCE. you dont throw a drink in someone unless youre willing to back it up and he wasnt. he went for the drama and then dropped to the ground like a coward.

I don't know, James. From a perfectly neutral standpoint, it is the fact that you continued things in such a public manner that I find disturbing. Sure, maybe he threw his drink first. Naturally, your first reaction would be to turn around and slug him... but wait, you're the promoter. When a couple of customers engage in barroom fisticuffs, what happens to them? The security tosses 'em out, that's what! Or is there any security at the Delancey?
Be that as it may, when things like this happen, you are supposed to be able to think things through in a more rational manner-- you are a producer, goddam it and not a patron! Do you want your patrons to witness an ugly, dramatic scene that leaves a bad taste about your event in their mouths?
Unlike Jade, I have no prob about friends or partners engaging in knock-down-drag-outs. Just do it in the alley out back, away from the people! An event, especially one in a nightclub and one that you produce in that venue, is not your personal playground.

Sure, he might have thrown the drink first, and most of those present would probably have missed it... but you chose to continue and escalate the whole thing, and take it to a whole new level of drama, ensuring that nobody present missed it.

Well that's just my two shillings...

This message has been edited. Last edited by: hatches,

This is completely insane. After a month's time James has not stepped back one bit. In fact, he has dug his heels in further. I have no investment in perpetuating animosity toward anyone. Life is difficult enough as it is. The reason I am not at the Delancey anymore is not because of the events March 8. Rather, I left because I was and continue to be appalled at the way in which James has behaved in the aftermath. It is one thing to do something in the heat of the moment. It is quite another to keep that heat at a boil in the days and weeks to follow. I don't have time to respond further at the moment.

I also witnessed the fight at unisex and earl dax is not taking the high road, he's taking the drunk road. I do no not know him and had never heard of him before but james is a friend of mine, we've worked together, he's very professional and DOES NOT DRINK on the job. He was completely sober and this Earl guy was completley wasted when he suddenly hauled off and threw a drink right into his business partner's face. Real professional.

I'm all for peace, love and unity, i am a pacifist and i hate violence and i hate the lack of unity in our community. But I am a man; my body produces testosterone which triggers an automatic aggressive response when i am physically attacked. As a veteran nightclub doorman, a longtime resident of nyc and a homo living in what was once a very rough neighborhood in brooklyn when i first moved here, I have been attacked repeatedly by drunken bar patrons, muggers on the street and your garden variety fag-bashers. Every time I am physically attacked i have responded aggressively and violently on a completely instinctual level,and thank god i did, because no mugger has ever walked away with so much as my metrocard in his pocket. In fact, most of them ran like hell. And the fag bashers in my hood all moved out to avoid the humiliation of being beat down by a homo. James responded the way any man would respond and Earl's behavior was cowardly and shameful. (He dropped to the foor and curled up in a fetal position - no wonder he doesn't want to discuss the details!)

James is a great guy and a hard worker, earl dax is a lush. If he had thrown a drink in my face you would be planning his memorial service and i would be choosing a jury for my manslaughter trial. The fact that earl got right up off the floor after the fight and headed straight back to the bar proves to me that James demonstrated REMARKABLE restraint in his handling of this situation. Anyone who thows a drink into someone's face should reasonably expect to be BEAT DOWN and certainly deserves it.

Rehab is very trendy right now, Earl...perhaps it wil help you gain the clarity to realize it is YOU who owes JAMES an apology.

Dean, most obviously you are James' friend since your characterization of events is taken page by page out of James' play book.

It might interest you to know that I DID APOLOGIZE TO JAMES! It was done through electronic communication, since James and I haven't actually had a conversation since that night at the Delancey. In the days immediately following the incident, I was fully willing and ready to concede that we had both made poor decisions, and I expressed my willingness to try and find a way that we could meet in the middle and address the longstanding difficulty we had working together.

Dana, the manager of the Delancey, volunteered to mediate the situation in real/time with James and me, but James refused.

Let's be honest here. Neither James nor I is a saint. We both made poor decisions. The situation is complicated because the incident in question is the result of frustrations on both sides that built up over a course of months. Moreover, if you and James have such a keen interest in the context for this incident, may I remind you that I did not throw the drink in James' face unprovoked.

What exactly happened to push me to the point that I lost my temper and threw a drink in his face? That's a question that bears answering...

I hurled the alcoholic beverage from my glass in response to James' yelling at my on the floor of the club and denigrating one of the artists who had just performed in the show.

After hosting the show on the main level of the club I walked up to the roof where I encountered James. Without hesitation he launched into the following rant: "Why did you let him do another number? Nobody wanted that. They were shouting 'No!" And then you let him do another number... and people left... and it SUCKED!" This was right in the bar area on the roof in front of many patrons of the party -- many of them friends of the performer being denigrated. Aside from the dubious veracity of James' assertion, his rant was inappropriate for numerous reasons including: a) the show was over, and nothing could be done about it at that point; b) he shouldn't yell at anyone - much less his business partner - on the floor of the party; c) the performer in question had already performed for us on 2 to 3 prior occasions w/out payment. this was his first proper booking, and I should have begrudged him an encore after 2 songs? We can't allow an additional 5 minutes in the service of the creative community we (or at least I) was attempting to foster?

After trying to solicit an objective impression of the show from Layard (who smartly demured), I went to the bar and kvetched with a friend about James' behavior. It was at that point that James came over to me again and began yelling at me again. At this point, I had had enough. I lost my temper, and the contents of my drink went flying.

Was throwing the drink an aggressive action? Yes. Was James yelling at me on the floor of the club (not for the first time) verbally abusive? Yes.

Dean, I understand that James is a friend of yours. He used to be a friend of mine. I know he has many attributes that are really great. I also know that he's not backing down because he knows he did something wrong, and for him to admit that would mean he would have to engage in a process of self-examination that he's not ready to undertake.

In closing, I'd really like to express my extreme anger about the blithe and malicious way you and James both go about these assertions of alcohol abuse. First of all, only the individual in quesiton can make the determination of whether or not they have a drinking problem. Second, if James was a friend to me and really believed I had/have a drinking problem, kicking me on the floor in a defenseless position is an interesting form of intervention. He never once approached me from a place of legitimate concern; the alcohol canard always came and comes up in James' attempts to deflect any kind of blame or self-incrimination. It always comes up as a form of character assassination and a means of discrediting me. This is not the expression of concern or the way to deal with something that you think is genuine problem. It is the tactic of a schoolyard bully. As for your flip "Rehab is very trendy right now, Earl..." I have merely to say FUCK YOU, DEAN JOHNSON. By your own admission you don't know me or anything about me. Furthermore as someone whose livelihood has been in large part tethered to the alcohol consumption of people at clubes and parties, I would think you might approach the subject of addiction with a little more tact.

Sincerly,
Earl