If Messy enters that High Life contest be prepared to empty a lot of used bags of glue from the dressing room.

Everyone will have to excuse Messy's brief absence from the diary since rumor has it she ran away to NO with a crackhead proctologist from Long Island and quickly passed out after an eight hour binge. Currently Messy is at some joint near Congo Square snoring away with her face submerged in a dish of jumbalaya.

Sweetie's in New Orleans too?

Hey everyone,
Thanks for all yer support.
I'm back from wherever the hell I was.

Yes I AM going to enter and WIN that stupid contest! Anything that Stank Ho Sweetiie can do I can do better. I give y'all sumthin' to talk about.

Now BRING IT ON!!!!!

That's right, briong on that beak, Bonnie!

Hey,
Who told you what I was gonna do? Was it Jackie?

Congratulations you are officially enterd in The Miss High Life Pageant taking place December 13 at 1am. Cash, Crown and Prizes could be yours.
But "There can only be ONE QUEEN"

3 categories

BRING IT LIKE JONBENET!

TALENT

EVENING GOWN/ QUESTION and ANSWER

Bring it like John Bennett.
Got it.

John Bennett

Dear diary,
I'm gonna enter Sweetie's Stank Ho Beauty Contest. Oughta be a piece a cake.

If you need any help with your hair and make up I hear that Astor Place Barbershop does wonders with a pair of clippers. Maybe you can win Andrea back with a new butch look.

Listen hon,
I'm through with that fat dyke Andrea.
OK, she's pretty hot in the sack but I'm not gonna put up with all them big words.
I'm seein' Jose the garbage man again.
But thanks for the beauty tip hon.
Astor Place huh...
I'll go check 'em out.
I plan on winnin' this two-bit contest.

If your're plannin on doin that 'Baton twirlin dumpster-diven spun monkey speed freak' routine to Jon Bennet's theme song that you keep showing off in the ladies' room at the Slide as your talent entry, I suggest an extra large tube of Wham-O airplane glue before you hit the stage.

good lookin' out.
I was plannin' on doin' that number. Thanks for the tip.
All you guys is so supportive of me, I really appreciate it. I just know I'm gonna snatch that trofey!

"trophy" Bonnie.

It's a beauty contest big guy not a spellin' bee.

Bonnie if you need help getting a gown made for the evening wear portion of the show, I can give you some names. Who will be doing your hair?

Flowbee, as usual.

I ain't sure what I'm gonna wear yet but my girlfriend Jackie Bigalow is gonna do my hair and make-up.

Dear diary,
Hey does anyone know where I live?