I don't know where you got that picher a my Moms Big Guy but forget about all that.
The big news is...
I'm goin' back with Andrea!
I got so horny rememberin' how dirty she can talk that I had to give the old thing a call.
Well, we got back together and it's better than ever. She lost a little weight an' looks real good.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Messy Bonnie Raitt,

Dear Blog,
I just woke up. Andrea is gone already, I guess she had some writin' to do. We had such a hot night, I didn't sleep a wink. Nobody turns me out like that woman! I think it's the way she talks dirty. She says we should go to Provincetown this summer an' get married.
I wonder if she has any money?
Can you make money writin' book's?
Maybe she can do a children's book.
Hey,
Maybe I'll write a children's book!
If what's-her-face can do it, anybody can.
Maybe I'll go down to the Kerballah Center today. Maybe what's-her-ass can give me some advise.

Dear Blog,
I think I'm gonna marry Andrea.
She makes me whole.

Messy, What does she do to your hole?

Messy! Was that Andrea in MY Dress Barn outfit today! U were supposed to return that to me...

I don't think Andrea could get one leg in your outfit Anna Nicole.

Bonnie, what's it worth to you for me not to tell Andrea about your current spouse, The Dallas Cowboys?

This message has been edited. Last edited by: seven,

Honey, I ain't seen them guys in a coon's age.

Believe me, if I been with a man Andrea knows.
She can just smell it.
If I even look at a man on the TV she beats the shit outa me.

This is the real thing.
We're gonna set the date soon.
Gonna be in Provincetown this June.
Probably B.Y.O. but Andrea says we might get a keg. I hope so. Maybe Jackie Bigalow might come in for it.

Get ready. The whole Dallas backfield has rented a bus and is vowing to not forever hold their peace. It's gonna be the Gradjiate all over again but without the short Jewish leading guy. Maybe Andrea can play Mrs. Robinson to a tight end or something. Since there definitely isn't going to be a tight end anywhere to be found among the wedding party.

Oh Messy... am sooooooooo sorry... first the Pope then this.... my thoughts are with you...
http://news.independent.co.uk/world/americas/story.jsp?story=628590

Bonnie's been crying her eyes out since she found out from the obit that Andrea had a husband!!!!

"...she had become increasingly frail as her knees had weakened and she suffered a series of falls. She died at the home in Washington DC she shared with John Stoltenberg, her partner of 30 years and husband since 1998."

"Her public life as a political activist began in 1965, as a 19-year-old protester against the Vietnam war -- long before suich protest became commonplace. She was arrested outside the US mission to the United Nations, and sent to New York City's Women's House of Detention. After she was subjected to a crude internal examination, her description of the experience created headlines worldwide."

"The notorious Messy Bonnie Raitt allegedly developed Dworkin's masochistic taste for such 'crude internal examinations' to a disproportionate degree. Scurrilous rumour has it ... that just such a series of 'operations' one week earlier served to accelerate Dworkin's demise."

Messy Bonnie, I am so sorry for you. But what else is new.

Left at the altar again!
How could she have up an' died like that?
It just ain't fair.
An' John Stoltenberg her "Husband"?
What the hell!!!
I been played again.
Let him take care of the funeral.
It's gonna take me a long time to get over Andrea. We was soul mates.


Did she leave a will?

I got a peek at the will. She left you her 'Manstopper'. A fifteen inch bowie knife kept lubricated with the melted fat of pro sports steroid users.

Her attorney told me for the past few weeks she was 'overly excited' about the prospect of her impeding nuptials to a "real woman" who knew how to "take it." In the attorney's opinion it was the frenzied anticipation of the wedding night that caused her collapse and demise.

I guess there's more than one way to screw your fiance'.

Dear Diary...
I mean Dear Blog,
I'm really over Andrea now 'cause I met this new girl... Donna. She's really into this Goth thing but that's OK 'cause so am I. We're goin' ta see Vulgarus on Friday. I'm hopin' Velocity can tell her where ta get some new tits! Those pancakes a hers gotta go if she's gonna be with me. I really like her style though. She don't drink neither which is cool. Don't have ta share the bottle. When she gets the tits done I want ta take her over to Master Steelow's and see if we can hook up with him. I think he's so hot. I just know seven is gonna like her too.

Donna

You are right about that. I wanna see 'her'
in one a Steelow's spanking contests. Last one a those I saw the heavy wood paddle broke in half on the second whack, and a piece of it flew all the way over the heads of the crowd and out the door.

I think Donna needs to hook up with Nurse Randella more than Steelow though. A little regular jab of hormones may do Donna's front bumpers some good. Although right now I think she'd go good in Kembra's Karen Black act.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: seven,

Hey Bonnie,

if Mister Softee went in to a strip club, what would he be when he came out?

Hmmmm...
I don't know.
Can't I jest say "Who's there"?
'Cause that's what I usually do.
I just say, "Who's there"?

THAT"S a MAN baby!

Close Bonnie. Mr. Softee would be who WAS there.

Bobby, what proof do you have Donna is a man?

This message has been edited. Last edited by: seven,